Justin's Gigantic Jolly Fun Time

I found like a bunch of these and they are all great

sarahlovescats:

What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier, it’s priceless. As I’m taking it down a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later I get a post card. I have a son, and he’s the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years. She’s never taken another lover. I don’t care, I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.

What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier, it’s priceless. As I’m taking it down a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico, but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I like the cold. Thirty years later I get a post card. I have a son, and he’s the chief of police. This is where the story gets interesting. I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years. She’s never taken another lover. I don’t care, I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.

(via canibalgiraffe)